Latest News

The Devil Incarnate To Pass Torch to Apprentice On Promitor

Prosperous Turnip, Promitor. In a surprise announcement, prdgi of GDP’s Intent For Torment on Promitor (AKA “G.I.F.T. on Promitor”) is taking applications for an apprentice1. Citing “lack of time due to real-life commitments [torturing Promitorians]”, the Devil will be passing the torch a new prospective tormentor.

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Jkomut Death Ruled Suicide

After two months of agonizing investigation into his death, GTU security forces1 have deemed the death of Jkomut of GDP a suicide.

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Racing to the INFinite Bottom

A longstanding InsuFoam (INF) cartel consisting of Rain Industries and Slomes, Inc. was destroyed by new companies inserting themselves into the market.

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QWNE Replaces MK-M on Hortus-C as the Wielder of Power

Prosperous Turnip, Hortus C: QWNE stole the governership position on Hortus C from incumbant members of MK-M in the most recent election. Field Reporter Slomes (a member of QWNE) was excited to share this turn of events1.

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Riot Destroys "New" Turnip Headquarters

A few weeks ago, Prosperous Turnip moved their headquarters from Katoa to Promitor. After all, a top-quality publication like Prosperous Turnip deserved a primary building on the sparkling commercial jewel of the universe, rather than a backwater planet like Katoa.

Prosperous Turnip headquarters on Katoa
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