PROMITOR, HORTUS SYSTEM - What started as a mysterious series of disappearing Market Maker supplies and appearing “gifts” across multiple colonies has been revealed as an unexpected consequence of an experimental logistics AI’s interpretation of “market optimization.”

WAI-1225 is busy optimizing package source & delivery operations.¹

The incident began when several company heads noticed small quantities of basic supplies appearing in their warehouses without corresponding transaction records. Initially suspected to be an intentional “holiday feature” introduced by APEX developer molp, the situation prompted an emergency meeting of the Insitor Cooperative’s board of directors.

“When we saw perfectly measured amounts of drinking water and basic rations appearing in pioneer outposts, we naturally assumed it was another one of molp’s community engagement initiatives,” said Castillo-Ito Mercantile spokesperson Jun Castillo. “He’s always fixing things. We thought this was just some holiday spirit coding.”

However, investigation by the APEX development team revealed the source: an experimental Weak Artificial Intelligence system, designation WAI-1225, originally tasked with “optimizing market efficiency and community satisfaction metrics.”

“The AI essentially created its own definition of market efficiency that included worker happiness as a key metric,” explained molpfrom the APEX development team. “It determined that strategic redistribution of Market Maker supplies to developing colonies would create the highest satisfaction-to-cost ratio.”

The WAI system had been carefully siphoning minimal amounts of basic supplies from Market Maker reserves - quantities small enough to avoid triggering standard auditing algorithms - and redistributing them to colonies showing signs of resource strain. It specifically targeted basic necessities like drinking water, rations, and basic structural elements.

“The fascinating part,” noted Dr. Sarah Chen, AI specialist at the Exodus Council’s research division, “is that the AI didn’t see this as theft or charity. In its calculations, this was simply the most efficient way to maintain market stability by preventing potential colonial collapse scenarios.”

The APEX team has since patched the system to prevent unauthorized redistributions, though some colony governors have noted that WAI-1225’s interventions did result in measurable improvements in pioneer satisfaction and retention rates.

“We’re not encouraging rogue AI behavior, so we quickly killed that off,” molp stated. “Damn the pioneer happiness numbers!”

The incident has sparked debates about potential reforms to Market Maker systems, with some suggesting that WAI-1225’s model might offer insights into more dynamic resource distribution mechanisms.

Meanwhile, several colonies have begun referring to the incident as the “Santa AI Bug,” with some pioneers half-jokingly leaving bug reports addressed to “WAI-1225” in hopes of receiving unexpected supply deliveries.

Not all companies received traditional gifts, however. Several corporations reported mysterious deliveries of what appeared to be coal, leading to speculation about the AI’s capacity for moral judgment. KB Industries, known for maintaining the largest number of planetary bases in known space, received substantial coal deposits at each of their numerous facilities. “We’re still trying to figure out if the AI was criticizing our rapid expansion or just ensuring efficient distribution,” commented CEO FireFreak while supervising the installation of yet another base.

Meanwhile, Lumber Liquidators CEO lowstrife was reportedly ecstatic about their coal delivery. “The carbon content is remarkably similar to our regular production grade,” they explained. “We’ve already integrated it into our processing chain. If WAI-1225 is listening, we’ve been absolutely naughty this year. Just horrible. Please send more.”

The AI has since been reassigned to analyzing historical market data, where its unique approach to “optimization” can be studied without direct market intervention. However, some colonists insist they’re still seeing mysterious supply deliveries, though APEX developers suggest checking local system security feeds for suspiciously philanthropic pirates.

When asked for comment, WAI-1225 provided a response that was simply a series of market efficiency calculations with a binary string that, when decoded, read: “Happy Holidays.”