Why Did the Chicken Cross the Galaxy?

Prosperous Turnip, Boucher. Police are on-scene and baffled by an event at Tykson Ranch. 5 of their 7 massive chicken coops have been completely removed from the property!

Artist impression of an escaped chicken in space 1

Spray painted by the suspected thieves on one of the remaining coops was the message “Animals Liberated by GATH!” GATH is a small, but well-funded activist group: Godlike Animal Treatment by Humans.

It’s a bizzare thing to consider that they would take off with chickens, given the popularity of chicken as a component in upscale RAT manufacturing. Tykson Ranch indicated that it would take them years to recover from the theft.

Update 19:22

Galatic Police intercepted a transport ship on its way to XT-743b with the 2 of the chicken coops inside during a random scan. GATH activists onboard were unwilling to cooperate regarding the remaining chickens, and had this to say about the destination:

XT-743b is isolated far away from the clutches of the corporations exploiting them, and the chickens could live peacefully; roaming free like they should be.

When asked what they would eat, and how they would keep the 119 °C temperatures from cooking them alive without a company providing a proper enclosure, they were mute.

  1. Image from: https://learn.unity.com/project/space-chicken ↩︎